The worst thing that came up in my medical assessment for this year, was ...
Hey! Here are some orchids!
Dirty ears. The nurse peered into my ears with that thingy and wrote down on my report 'dirt in ears'. The doctor later advised me on how to care for my ears.
Flame said to me recently, while looking over my bed that crouches next to the living room fire. 'Sarah, you'll never find a boyfriend with a broadaxe and a cask of wine next to your bed.' Like she's an expert on the psychosexual aspects of relationships, gender and film studies. Apparently it is really all about ear health.
It's funny ... I was gonna write a post about orchids and how I've seen the most amazing orchids over the last few weeks. It's been a shitty season for fungi but really good for orchids.
Anyway, despite what I regularly do to my body and mind, I came through the medical with blazing colours, except for that ear thing.
How are your ears going folks?
An axe and a cask of wine by your bed? You sound like the sort of girl I was always looking for. I haven't been to a doctor for over 40 years either. I have always worked on the principal that what I cannot cure myself will cure itself in time, but I have now reached the age where some things are only going to get worse, and even a girl with an axe by her bed would not look twice at me. Oh well.
ReplyDeleteOh, and my ears are so dirty I have a hard job hearing.
DeleteI never go near a doctor. I work it out for myself from life experience.
ReplyDeleteYou are all my best people!
DeleteGreat news Sarah Toa. And yes, I'm another one who never goes to the doctor. At my last visit, which I only begrudgingly went to as a follow up for a UTI, my thin as a rake female doctor in high heels told me rudely that I needed to lose some weight. Well fuck me - as if I didn't know that. And as if I hadn't neeb trying. Easy for her to say with an obviously rapacious metabolism. Avoiding the doctor is a multi-generational inter-family tradition - my mother who is 80 with some very suspicious looking large dark moles on her forehead - is in rude health and avoids the doctor like the plague. Her father, my Dutch grandfather died at 95 after smoking for 60 years, never going to the doctor and treating his own ailments with some very creative remedies that might have killed someone else. I think my father gave himself Parkinsons over-dosing himself on cyanide infused apricot kernels for a brain tumour, that miraculously disappeared after a second brain scan much later - much to the confusion of the medical profession. I'm hoping my genes will stand me in good stead.
ReplyDeleteI remember your father doing that, or you telling me about it anyway. I think genes have a lot to answer for, good or bad. Fortunately we seem to have good ones. It's a blessing.
ReplyDelete