Friday, October 14, 2011

I Want to Get Off: Advice is Welcome

How do I delete myself from FaceBook? Permanently?

I thought I'd dived under the radar two years ago, only to discover tonight that my homepage is still up and running and 30,000 people (well, okay, not quite) have since tried to 'friend' me.I don't like FaceBook and the magic delete button is mysteriously missing on the settings page. Another thing I don't like is that this 'private company' is collecting information about me and selling it to other companies/prospective employers/ex boyfriends. If that kind of behaviour came from the Australian government, you'd think Big Brother, riots in the street, or maybe even a tax file number.

Just because I'm paranoid doesn't mean they aren't out to get me. I disabled the gps on the my phone the same day I bought it. I found out recently that my mere fumblings will not waylay the reptilian instincts of NASA or Google Maps. Those guys will always know where I am so long as I own a mobile phone (even if it is switched off). I discovered a website where you can stalk your ex for less than ten dollars a month by entering both your mobile phone numbers. Aghhh! Give me country gossip, a strange man following me home from the pub at midnight and the acknowledged inconfidentiality of social services in a small town any day. I'd prefer that. At least I can counter that with letters, fisticuffs and a chance meeting in the meat section of my local supermarket.

Apparently if I'm not breaking the law then all observation is benign and kinda friendly. My, how we have evolved since Bentham's panopticon.

I dislike my car's number plate being broadcast on the internet in the front yard of my home c. 2010, when the grass needed slashing and the geraniums could have done with some water. If I want to tell you about my lacklustre gardening, what time I turn on the kitchen lights or where exactly I am in the continent, I'll let you know on A WineDark Sea.

And there is the rub.

But I still want to remove myself from Facebook. Any suggestions?


  1. my life is an open book on the net and perhaps it shouldnt be
    having said this , will will not "do" facebook, will not give my birthdate out and will not show any of you my credit card number

    perhaps I should be like TOM STEPHENSON and not really exist

  2. I'm with you Sarah.

    Look out for the red lazer dot forming on your forehead as the cruise missile skims the ocean...

    PS John's Birthday is the 33rd of June 1948. Card No. 118 8877696969

  3. There is not a total removal from FB.
    It is disgraceful but Everything that an individual posts up becomes their (FB's) property!

  4. I was once convinced to sign up on Facebook by my daughter, but the only person who wanted me as a friend was an Australian sado-masochist with the same name as me.

    So, of course, I signed off, but of course I didn't.

    You have to sit around being boring and ignoring everyone until they lose interest. Then THEY go away, but you do not.

    Welcome to the Hotel California....

  5. P.S. - Of course I fucking exist. I exist more in this form than most of the animal hoarders and recipe writers that exist in blogland. I feel like Tinkerbell now - the more you say you don't believe, the more I come to get you whilst you sleep.

    Sorry, this rant is directed toward John Gray and not you, dear Sarah T.

  6. Thanks Tom, glad about that, though you'd have to fly a long way to get me in my sleep.
    Thanks for all your comments. However after all my whining, I have resolved absolutely fucking nothing. FB just sent me an email congratulating me on 'reactivating' my account. Bah!

  7. I just recently cancelled my account. You have to go looking for it and I can't remember, but somewhere in setttings........somewhere. They make it very bloody difficult. Ask RamSnake, he knows that stuff!!

  8. Unfortunately MF cancelling your FB account does not remove the information about yourself, for everything about you and all comments etc are retained by FB.
    So don't kid yourself!

  9. Um, I use facebook -sparingly, I suppose- and find it great. It keeps me in contact with family and friends around the world.

  10. Go to your account settings. Click on the security option in the menu on the left and you will see "Deactivate your account" at the bottom of the Security section list.

  11. Yay, thankyou Ramsnake. I will pass that on.
    I think though, from memory, that is what I tried two years ago. Deactivating an account may be different from deleting it and Fukkerberg was so happy yesterday when I'd 'reactivated' it.
    I'll try it and let you know.

  12. Well, they had diddly squat info about me anyway Mr Heron. Being the suspicious bitch that I am, I only ever put up my name, year of birth and maybe my astrological sign, perhaps a musical instrument I am associated with. That info is available anywhere anyway.

  13. I hate Facebook too - mainly for its inanity. As if these people from my past or some world network of friends of freinds are actually my "friends". My friends are the people i see and talk to every week.
    As I recall i think I made up a birthdate on mine so, though my name is there, very little else is listed. Mind you, I'm all over the internet because of a book I edited 15 years ago. That and my blog. Hmmmmmm.

    But thanks I am inspired to delist myself.

  14. I think I've managed to delete my account now, thanks to ramsnakes advice. Next job is dealing with the blue links!